Corey's Blog

10 May 2009

 I feel very strongly about a new ministry that is taking place in my church and I thought I’d write my views on it. I have a lot I want to say and I will try my best to be clear and to say all that I feel about it. I cannot think of the exact name of the ministry but it is for folks who are divorced or who are going through a divorce. I will assume it’s some kind of support group maybe similar to Celebrate Recovery. Insert here, the name of the ministry is DivorceCare. Anyway, here’s why I’m against it.

 Divorce is something that Jesus spoke about. He was not silent on the issue and He was very clear in what He thought about divorce. But not only did Jesus mention divorce but so did Paul in the epistles. From my understanding of Holy Scripture the only acceptable reason for divorce is infidelity.

 Scripture is very clear that divorce is wrong and it is a sin. While it will allow folks to divorce, if they do divorce they are not free to get remarried. The Bible says that if you marry a divorced person you and that person are committing adultery. So, if a couple gets divorced the only option they have is to remain single.

 The Bible does speak of unbelievers, if a believer is married to an unbeliever and the unbeliever does not wish to stay with the believing spouse, then the person is not obligated to remain married to them. However, if the unbeliever wishes to remain married the believer is not allowed to leave the unbelieving spouse.

 When asked about divorce Jesus was very clear when He said let no man put asunder what God has joined together. When a man and a woman get married the two become one flesh. According to scripture the only thing that voids this contract is the death of one of the spouses. If a spouse dies then the contract is null and void and the living spouse is allowed to remarry, especially if that spouse is young and of child bearing age.

 Now, the reasons this ministry bothers me are a few. First, I feel that it is condoning sin. It is saying that divorce is ok and so if you get divorced come to this ministry and we will support you and tell you everything is alright. That is wrong it is a sin to get divorced. It is black and white, period, no ifs and or buts about it. And so the church should treat divorce as sin and a person who gets divorced should be reprimanded by the church and told under no circumstances are they to get remarried.

 The Holy Bible is very clear on this, I am not making it up and I am taking a very strong stance on this. It is clearly wrong and it was important enough for Jesus Himself to speak on the issue several times during His ministry.

 Now, for the biggest reason why I am so strongly against this is because of the following. I am a Christian, a Born Again believer and I believe that the Holy Bible is the inerrant Word of God. I realize that we all sin, we all fail, this is not my issue. But, not only am I a Christian, but I am a gay Christian. And I find this to be most hypocritical on the church’s side.

 In order for me, a Christian man who happens to be gay, wishes to remain in the church I must refrain from pursing love and happiness. I must live with the fact that I can never fall in love or get married because it is against the church. While Jesus Himself never spoke of homosexuality, the church is very adamant about this. They are fine with me as long as I remain single and celibate.

 Well, the same requirements that are laid upon me should be laid upon folks who get married. And there is a huge, huge difference in all of this. I never chose to be gay. If I had my way, I would be married with 9 kids. I never wanted to be gay, I hate being gay, but I am gay and I am a Christian so I have to follow the laws of the church and I gladly do so because I chose my faith over my fleshly desires. But, a person who gets divorced is clearly making a choice. This is a choice to get divorced and so if a person chooses to get divorced then they should have to follow all the rules and guidelines that are laid out before them in the Holy Bible. Which is for them to remain single and not get remarried.

 And to say that it’s too hard or to say but it’s not fair, they need somebody to love. They need somebody to care for them they deserve the same rights as everybody else. I say bullsh*t, I deserve all of that too but they deny me. I have to live by the rules and so should a divorced person. No ifs ands or buts.

 So, in summary a person who willfully chooses to get divorced should be reprimanded for going against the teachings of Christ. Also, if after this the person pursues a relationship and remarries then that person should be excommunicated from the church. There is no room in the church for adulterers especially if there is no room for homosexuals. If the church wishes to play hardball against homosexuality, then they must follow the teachings of the Bible and take a stand against divorce and remarriage. No matter how hard or how painful or how lonely it may be for the person after their divorce. It was their choice, now they must live with the consequences of their choice. As I said, being gay is not a choice but being divorced is. The church cannot be hypocritical about this. They must take a stand against divorce and they must do what is right in God’s eyes on all accounts. They cannot pick and chose which sins they will condone and which sins they will not tolerate.

 And I defy anybody, anybody at all, to quote me one Scripture that proves Jesus said anything about homosexuality. It just didn’t happen, yet He was very strong in His stance on divorce.

 So for now…